[star trek xi] [1/1] [k/s preslash] [pg-13] The 80/20 Theory As Applied To Cats on The Bed

[lazulisong]

All I can say is thank Christ this isn't as pornographic as I briefly considered making it, because I'm at Central right in the third floor lobby (it's easier for me to concentrate at the library) while Kagami charges up and oh my God, the amount of small children toddling innocently by is enough to make a girl swear off writing porno ever again.

Thanks to ymfaery, who, bless her heart, has been dragooned into ARE YOU SURE THIS JOKE IS FUNNY? WHAT ABOUT THIS ONE? THIS ONE??? all through this, and to the rest of the usual suspects as well. ILU dudes.

Title: The 80/20 Theory As Applied to Cats on the Bed
Series: Star Trek XI
Pairing: K/S preslash
Word Count: 4000ish orz
Rating/Warnings: Do not allow Meg to write fic while under the influence of sleep deprivation. Do not fold, wrinkle, spindle or mutilate. Do not read if you are offended by jokes about Spock's rapidly waning dignity. Do not attempt to share a twin bed with a border collie and a kitten who is gay for the dog. Bones is a big fat potty mouth.
Disclaimer: Yeah, no. Also no tribbles were harmed in the making of this fic, although Spock's dignity may never be the same.

( Item: If you share a bed with a border collie, the ratio is more like 90-10, not in favor of the human. If you share a bed with a border collie AND a cat, you might as well just make your entire bedroom into one big mattress in hopes of getting a corner to yourself. )